Collective prayer is prized in Jewish tradition — Michal Stamova

[Editor’s note: This interview originally appeared on 25 September 2023. Yom Kippur in 2024 begins at sundown on Friday, 11 October 2024 and ends at nightfall on Saturday, 12 October 2024.]

Our guest is Rebbetzin Michal Stamova, who holds a Master's degree in history, specializing in Jewish studies, and consults Project Kesher Ukraine on Jewish education. She talks about the holidays of Yom Kippur and Sukkot, fasting, prayers, and other traditions.

The holiest day

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: We previously looked at Rosh Hashanah and its key traditions. Yom Kippur is also a very important day. Is it appropriate to consider it a holiday?

Michal Stamova: That's an excellent question. I love good questions in general, and yours is spot on. The Ukrainian word for holiday means something holy or sacred. And Yom Kippur is indeed sacred.

In general, the Hebrew word for holiday has several meanings. The word Yom Tov means "good day." And when we say a holy day, it's a day separated from something. Yom Kippur is, above all, the holiest day. It's a very separate, very special day, you might say. So, it can be called a holiday and Yom Tov, because it is the holiest day of the year in the Jewish calendar. It is the most solemn day.

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: Can we say that it's the most important day?

Michal Stamova: The most important one. Yes, I can say there are a lot of important dates. In general, Yom Tov is defined as a Torah holiday. That is, these are the holidays mentioned in the Torah and assigned to us by the Almighty. And it is written that on this very day, you will do this and that and will not work, but you will do something else instead. Now, Yom Kippur is Yom Tov, i.e., a holiday from the Torah. And there are clear predictions about what we will do on this day. First of all, the Almighty will forgive your sins. This is very cool because precisely on this day, you will be forgiven everything you have repented of. You have analyzed your actions over the year and reconciled, and this day is a solemn holiday when the Almighty forgives you. Your sins are brought to judgment and forgiven because you confessed them to yourself and the Most High. You have analyzed yourself, and everything is canceled. There are fascinating traditions around this holiday that help you understand and grasp it. It is hard for us to understand something abstract; we desire something visible.

Time before Yom Kippur

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: I understand that ten days before Yom Kippur are also important. What are the things observed during this period?

Michal Stamova: This period is even longer than ten days and generally lasts 40 days. From the beginning of the Jewish month of Elul, when people begin to reappraise themselves, analyze their lives over the year, and recite special prayers called selichot, the prayers of repentance and awareness.

When people enter this special state, they think, "How do I rate myself this year?" In the Jewish tradition, the zodiac signs are also recognized; they are called mazolot. They are not banned. So, in principle, it corresponds to Virgo (a period of reappraisal and return of the children, the daughter of Israel to the Most High), then Libra (deliberation), and it ends, as it were, with Yom Kippur.

So, there are 40 days: 30 days before Rosh Hashanah and another 10 days in the month of Tishrei to finish off this period. There are ten days of repentance for those who have not done it in a month. Then comes Yom Kippur, which is the finale. The final prayer service is called "Neilah," which means "locking." It's as if the gates of the Most High are being locked. This 40-day period is for forgiveness, repentance, reconciliation with others, and reappraisal. And the finale is Yom Kippur. When they say, "All is forgiven," a record is made and sealed in the Book of Life; the shofar is blown for the last time, and Neilah is recited. However, our sages say that there is also the feast of Sukkot. And even if you haven't managed to do everything in time, there is still the feast of Sukkot when you welcome guests. You have an opportunity to do something good even after Sukkot, and then the cycle of autumn holidays ends, and the new year begins.

This is when the holidays are over, and you start working. A friend of mine once said: "I had a grandfather who was a rabbi, and he always said, 'There's Yom Kippur, and then let's receive guests; this is the last chance.'" Receiving guests is not a simple matter. We do our best so that after Sukkot, the Most High would write our names in the Book of Life, the book of profits, the book of peace, and all that.

Reappraisal

Michal Stamova: I like Judaism because we have many versions of how we should celebrate. And they are about how we broadcast our Jewish tradition. It is written in the Torah that we will have this day of forgiveness and redemption. I have recently heard this beautiful phrase: we are sentenced to life, i.e., the Almighty delivers a verdict for us to continue living.

We feel it very deeply, more than ever, to be honest. We are reconsidering this holiday with such hope as never before because earlier life was peaceful, and we rejoiced and always bought some gifts, etc. Now, we ask for our lives, for the continuation of life for ourselves, our loved ones, close ones, friends, and soldiers.

The price of life has increased so much, and here we are, waiting for the Almighty to write our names in the Book of Life. We used to wish not only that but also good earnings and many good things for ourselves, but now all we ask for is peace and continuation of life for ourselves and Ukraine.

I received a message yesterday: "I'm pregnant, so what do I do? How how much should I bring?" There is a specific ritual there. And I said, "Bring for two people." It made me so happy! Life goes on, and I just saw this expecting mother asking both for her baby and her husband, for their lives to be continued. There is a very acute sense of the price of life, its continuation, and the Almighty writing our names in the Book of Life for the upcoming year.

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: Are there any special roles for Yom Kippur when women should do one thing and men something else? Is there any greater burden on men or women?

Michal Stamova: You are asking me not just as a Jewish woman but as a rabbi's wife. I have been working with Project Kesher for a long time now as the wife of a conservative rabbi. I cooperate with this project because it is a women's organization, a feminist one. There's equality in our stream of Judaism, which we quite consciously chose. Both in Project Kesher and in the conservative stream, women and men pray together. In Project Kesher, women become aware of themselves; they understand that they can pray and fast on par with men.

Fasting on Yom Kippur is a very conscious choice.

As is always the case in the Jewish tradition, the main value is life, its preservation, and health. A woman makes a choice to fast to the end and pray for herself and her children.

I was recently asked: "Can I fast for my husband?" I said: "Well, you're not his mother." Starting from the age of 13, our boys are already responsible for themselves; they pray and fast for themselves. You can pray for yourself, your underage child, or if you are pregnant. If you are sick, you can forgo fasting. Elderly women and men do not fast, either, although many want to. Some are on medications; others drink water and medicine, and still others eat light meals on this day. It always depends on a person's health in the Jewish tradition.

Clothes and traditions on Yom Kippur

Michal Stamova: I can tell you what I do. I know I need to provide my family with the necessary things and prepare modest clothes (always white, no jewelry, perfume, cosmetics, leather, or anything expensive). People dress very plainly on this day.

We say that white clothes are not dyed clothes. Jewish tradition says that dyed, colored clothes are very expensive and elegant. That's why we wear white. And we don't wear leather clothes because that is very expensive, too. Footwear is also most basic, not leather. And, of course, we spend this day in fasting and prayer.

I leave something very simple to eat for our children. (I have one underage child.) I say: "You'll find something for yourself there. You'll see some basic foodstuffs: vegetables, fruit, and some boiled potatoes." I will not go into the kitchen.

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: What spiritual things should be there on Yom Kippur? Are there any special rituals, perhaps an active prayer, etc.?

Michal Stamova: Why are clothes and food very plain? Because it is a day dedicated to spiritual introspection and repentance. Special prayers are recited in synagogues: Selichot and Viddui ("confession"). We do not have a confession before a rabbi. Instead, we have the Viddui prayer recited every morning.

There is an especially large number of prayers on Yom Kippur. One is Avinu Malkeinu, which is repeated many times. Barbra Streisand recorded a light version of it as a song, which is very well-known. It is a Jewish liturgy aimed at glorifying the name of the Most High.

There are a lot of piyyutim. Piyyut is a genre of Jewish prayer that glorifies the Most High. While very similar to Arabic love lyrics, it is about love for and glorification of the Almighty. Piyyut is a genre of song, poem, and elegy dedicated to the Almighty.

We ask for forgiveness; we say that we have sinned. And we do this collectively. Collective prayer is prized in the Jewish tradition. Ten or more people get together because the unity of the Jewish people is still important. We say that we have all sinned in deed, word, mind, and look.

There is a very long, liturgically composed prayer on Yom Kippur. Intention is also essential — you need to be very sincere in what you do. There is a special term, kavanah, meaning "inclination of the heart," which is something you and the Almighty can appraise.

On this day, you don't eat. Instead, you fast and pray, saying: "Indeed, this year I have not fulfilled what I wanted before you. I may have done few good things or haven't thought about you or my loved ones." It is all written down very nicely in this prayer, and a person tunes in and prepares themselves to be clay in the hands of the Most High. That is why we have this day; it is especially spiritual.

The Book of Jonah

Michal Stamova: The Book of Jonah is recited in synagogues. It is a book of the prophet who spent three days in the belly of a whale because he disobeyed God. It is generally a complex book. The prophet Jonah was sent to Nineveh, a territory hostile to Israel. You might say he was sent to Syria, to the pagans, to tell them that if they did not repent, the Almighty would simply destroy them.

Jonah did not want to go there because they were the enemies of Israel. He went in the opposite direction, and the Almighty punished him. His ship sank, and he was swallowed by a big fish. Jonah repented inside that fish and said: "Forgive me, I am already dying. So be it."

Miraculously, the whale spitted him out, and he went to Nineveh and simply said to the people there: "If you do not repent, the Almighty will punish you, and you will perish." The king of Nineveh said: "This may be true. Here is someone who looks like a prophet. Let us all repent and pray, and may the Almighty forgive us."

The people of Nineveh they started fasting. There was this tradition to sprinkle ashes on your head and dress in torn clothes. They prayed, and the Almighty forgave them.

And Jonah said: "Well, why did you send me then? I knew you would forgive them." And this is such an example for us. If you are even the worst sinner and do not believe in the Almighty, you are aware of your sins. So, we have hope that the Almighty says: "I forgive you. I will not destroy you but will continue your life." And so, the Book of Jonah is read on this day so that we have hope that if we have even done something very bad and, in general, have strayed far from the Most High... If I realize this in my heart, if only on this day, if only in the last minutes, the Most High says: "I forgive you." The shofar is then blown; we realize that the gates are being closed, and there is a verdict: "I forgive you. You are sentenced to life. I have written your name in the Book of Life."

This is how we see it, and then this fast ends, and everyone goes home exalted. People eat at home and celebrate the continuation of life, saying: "I hope that God has given me this year for something good."

Donations on Yom Kippur

Yelyzaveta Tsarehradska: The Jewish tradition is common to all Jews, but it seems that it may be implemented in different ways. Are there any processes or traditions among Ukrainian Jews, in Ukraine, that differ from other countries?

Michal Stamova: It may even depend on the streams [of Judaism]. For example, in some streams, the kapparot ritual is practiced a few days before Yom Kippur: a chicken is slaughtered to symbolize sacrifice. These chickens are then given to poor families to provide them with meat for a pre-holiday meal. Some just bring money and say that that's the price. Many such charitable donations are made to poor families before Yom Kippur.

I think that a donation made to a soldier in the Armed Forces of Ukraine is the same as giving to the poor before Yom Kippur. The main thing is being aware that this is charity.

One possible difference is that it is a non-working day in Israel with its high concentration of Jews. Meanwhile, Jews ask to be given a day off in Ukraine. We have it in the Constitution that you can take a day off for reasons of faith. We have never had any problems with this, and our children have been granted a day off school. I know that our community members always take a day off for Yom Kippur. But you understand that there is no influx of people like in Israel or some other country where there are many Jews... Nevertheless, you can always see people dressed in white clothes in Podil on Yom Kippur. This has always been visible in Ukraine, especially in Kyiv and particularly in the Podil district, where there were five different synagogues and communities.

Ukrainian Jewish women

Michal Stamova: I don't see big differences on Yom Kippur. Perhaps only in numbers and appearance. In places with a warm or warmer climate, everyone dresses in white, while people wear coats in Ukraine, where the weather is colder.

So, Yom Kippur celebrations are very, very similar in general: fasting, prayer, shofar blowing, donations, and then some kind of meal together. It may be more visible in some other countries with a larger Jewish population. But it is also visible in Ukraine, especially in Kyiv and Odesa, where many Jews live. It is visible because, after the festivities, people are so happy as they walk down the streets in white clothes and some simple sneakers, because these are not leather shoes.

It is a simple holiday, one of prayer and unity. Everything you've done is still not enough. Still, there are a lot of things that are far from ideal this year because we all understand that we are human.

We, humans, are aware of our dependence on the Almighty and ask Him to extend this life for us so that next year would be better than last year. And this year, I express my wish by saying: "Let us be." Let us be this year. As I said, we became so poignantly aware of the value of life after the full-scale invasion began. And we talk about it a lot with the girls in Project Kesher.

The girls in Project Kesher are doing so much. I really like working with them because of this excellent unity of Jewish and non-Jewish women and awareness that we are Ukrainian Jewish women.

We started switching our lectures to Ukrainian probably a few years before the full-scale invasion. And we started doing things that made us feel like Ukrainian women. And now, we have produced many translations of Jewish prayers and selichot into Ukrainian because you need to know what you are reading, not just in Hebrew or transliteration. That's why many people have now begun to realize their Jewish faith. If we do not know Hebrew, we can do it in Ukrainian. Before that, all our books, including prayer books, were in Hebrew, unfortunately.

The autumnal Jewish holiday of Yom Kippur is the Day of Purification, the Day of Forgiveness, the Day of Atonement, and the Day of Judgment. It is celebrated on the 10th day of the seventh month, which, in 2023, is from the evening of 24 September to the evening of 25 September.

Sukkot is a harvest festival, a biblical holiday. It is celebrated for seven days, beginning on the 15th day of Tishrei. In 2023, it is observed from the evening of 29 September to the evening of 6 October.

Project Kesher Ukraine is a national Ukrainian Jewish women's civic organization that supports female entrepreneurs, promotes gender equality, and encourages Jewish women to preserve their people's traditions and pass them on to the next generation. The project helps interested representatives of other religions and cultures acquaint themselves with Jewish culture. "Kesher" means "connection" in Hebrew.

Vlada Nedak, executive director of Project Kesher Ukraine, has appeared in Hromadske programs multiple times. As part of the 16 Days of Activism for No Violence Campaign, Nedak and other experts talked about how violence could be recognized and what everyone could do to counteract it.

This transcript has been edited for length and clarity.

This program is created with the support of Ukrainian Jewish Encounter (UJE), a Canadian charitable non-profit organization. 

Originally appeared in Ukrainian (Hromadske Radio podcast) here.

Translated from the Ukrainian by Vasyl Starko.

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